The Dominion war song

Hi All,

Meanwhile in the Alpha Quadrant and Star Trek Galaxy.

The Federation alliance is loosing the Dominion war [ My sister Rachel  thought that  Dr Bashair was 'dishy']  :

In May of twenty three seventy three the Dominion invaded
the Martian Empire
The  war had just begun:
The Dominion had the biggest ship that had the biggest guns
They called it Hitler to spite their human adversaries 
It  was the fastest ship that ever sailed the alpha quadrant
On her deck were guns as big as steers and shells as big as trees

Out of the cold and foggy night came the Martian ship the Dralifh
And ev'ry Martian  spaceaman, he knew and understood
They had to sink the Hitler , the terror of the quadrant
Stop those guns as big as steers and those shells as big as trees

We'll find that Dominion  battleship that's makin' such a fuss
We gotta sink the Hitler   cause the Galaxy depends on us
Hit the decks a-runnin' boys and spin those guns around
When we find the Hitler  we gotta cut her down

The Dralifh found the Hitler  and on that fatal day
The Hitler  started firin' fifteen  astronomical units away
"We gotta sink the Hitler " was the battle sound
But when the smoke had cleared away, the mighty Dralifh went down

For six long days and weary nights they tried to find her trail
Emperor Esther  told the people "Put ev'ry ship a-sail
'Cause somewhere on that plane I know she's gotta be
We gotta sink the Hitler  to the bottom of  space"

We'll find that Dominion battleship that's makin' such a fuss
We gotta sink the Hitler cause the galaxy depends on us
Hit the decks a-runnin' boys and spin those guns around
When we find the Hitler we gotta cut her down

The fog was gone the Shabbat  day and they saw the mornin' sun
Ten light years  away from the   Cardassian homeland
the Hitler made its run
The Admiral of the  Martian  fleet said "Turn those bows around
We found that Dominion  battleship and we're gonna cut her down"

The Martian  guns were aimed and the shells were comin' fast
The first shell hit the Hitler , they knew she couldn't last
That mighty Dominion battleship is just a memory
"Sink the Hitler " was the battle cry that shook the seven galaxies

We found that Dominion battleship was makin' such a fuss
We had to sink the Hitler  'cause the galaxy depends on us
We hit the deck a-runnin' and we spun those guns around
Yeah, we found the mighty Hitler  and then we cut her down

We found that Dominion battleship was makin' such a fuss
We had to sink the Hitler  'cause the galaxy depends on us
We hit the deck a-runnin' and we spun those guns around
Yeah, we found the mighty Hitler  and then we cut her down

The Cardassians, Shapeshifters and Breen declared war us  

The Martian Empire has endured for a million millennia

Whilst into bloody war we have been thrust

The Dominion will be crushed

With our allies of the Federation , Klingons and Romulans

In our  God  & Emperor Esther II we trust

No retreat and no surrender !

With hugs to Johnny Horton  :

Hydrogen fuel for cars?

Hi All,

Interesting report from the times of Israel , that Israelis have come up with a way to use  hydrogen fuel in cars !

Cool!🔯😃🏄😉😊😎🎼🍹🍺🍷

Martian Steamed beer

Hi All,

The Bahar or Martians predominantly use soft power to cement their great power status in the universe. There are many ways they do this, but the bulk of their soft power is via food and beverages.  This is on top of an economy which produces medicines, equipment, heavy engineering, space craft and other high end products.

Martian ale is particularly popular with Martians and the rest of the universe, having a massive domestic and interstellar reputation for quality  and there are billions of breweries ranging from small to mega corporations . Their ale can be divided into the following types :

1.  Cask ale 

2.  Nitrogen keg  porters and stouts

3. Steamed  beer

4. Carbonated beer  (larger on earth)

Martian ales and beers tend to be extremely strong compared to earth beers ranging from a minimum of  ABV 5 % to  a maximum ABV 20%.

The list above can be further divided into colour types such as violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange, red, black , white and brown. 

As Guinness is to Ireland , the most famous type is number 3  or Martian Steamed beer, perhaps because no-one else produces it.  MSB as it is known in English  has as its key ingredient frozen alcohol e.g.  ethanol and methanol from asteroids, comets and clouds of gas and ice floating in space.  Naturally almost none of this ice is actually 100% proof of either types of alcohol , having various impurities such as carbon dioxide, nitrogen, oxygen, hydrogen and sometimes silver or gold  or even a  mixture of alcohols etc etc . 

What a good brewer will do and a good brewer is also a knowledgeable chemist , is to be able to analyse the chemical breakdown of the ice and decide which to use for a particular beer, adding stuff as necessary, similar to a recipe in cooking,  to impart a particular flavour , colour , taste and of course to understand alcohol content.  

The method is the same :  the ice is cut into cubes and grouped together in containers  of similar content. This is sent to a pub which keeps them in a sufficiently, extremely  cold freezer ( so cold a human being would die within a minute) ;  herbs, malt, barely,  spices etc are also sent with a recipe .  When served the cubes and spices are put into a crystal glass and a machine will release a band of super hot steam  or plasma from an on-site miniature  nuclear star  reactor ( another reason why only Martians service this beer) - hence the name steamed beer-   into the glass, melting the ice and forming it into a liquid alcohol , which can be done warm i.e. for Mars British room temperature   , hot  like coffee or cold like a larger.  Water, at whatever temperature is asked for ,  is added to make up the rest of the beer. 

Measurements  for all ales are divided along the following and each pub and brewery will have their own brands and type of crystal cut glass:

Emperor   8 pints 

Prince 6 pints 

Duke  4 pints 

Count 2 pints

Earl 1 pint 

Baron 1/2  pint

Baronet 1/4 pint  

All Martian pubs, taverns, free houses etc are sit down with a waiting service. Unlike in Britain waiting and bar management  is a very  prestigious form of employment and it is customary to give tips of at least 10% of the bill.

Israel's quiet diploamtic revolution

Despite the hostility towards Israel by the far left, the far right, Iran  and Islamist fractions, in reality Israel has been developing informal cordial relationships with many Arab states. Israel does have full formal diplomatic relations with Egypt and Jordan, albeit these relationships do not permeate down into Arab society (unfortunately decades of demonising Israel and Jews via education and state propaganda cannot be undone overnight) . What is less well know is that Israel is also developing relationships with various Gulf states .

As this picture shows :

The person in the centre of the picture is of (retired) Brigadier- General  Miriam 'Miri' Regev, Israel's culture/sports Minister, who  is of  Sephardi-Mizrahi heritage . Regev  is seen by the Ashkenazi dominated  Israeli left as a 'stereotypical Mizrahi woman' because of her outspoken, forthright,  folksy and flag waving  personality. In this picture she is dressed similarly to Hannah's grandmother when they lived in Iraq. Regev  is off visiting the UAE and in this picture the world's third largest mosque. Regev, who is both right wing, but also supportive of Israel's Gays and Lesbians, also watched Israel win a gold in the Judo championship, complete with national anthem being played, which brought her to tears.

This may sound ridiculous, but in the past Arab countries have either tried to  stop Israel from competing in international tournaments on their soil or forbid the usage of the Israeli national anthem and flag. So in the context of 70 years of hostility to the world's only Jewish state, this is somewhat of a breakthrough for Israel.  It also goes to show that on the ground Israel's more pragmatic neighbours are willing enough to see that Israel isn't going anywhere and is worth engaging with. Something which the British left don't quite grasp yet.

  

Pittsburgh Massacre

In America and during Shabbat 11 Jews were murdered by a Jew hating fanatic. Jews who were merely attending their Synagogue. Jew hate is, it seems, capable of rearing its ugly head anywhere and a tragic reminder of the necessity of Israel to exist.  I'm sure that readers will join us in saying to those who have lost loved ones  “May the Almighty comfort you amongst the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”

I also trust that the Chief Rabbi of Israel will change his mind, put his theological differences aside and remembers that Conservative Jews are still Jews, even if they are misguided as to proper Orthodoxy.  Israel is after all a place for all Jews and not a handful of Jews. I hope that he comes to his senses and calls the Synagogue to offer his  condolences.

Isle of Man in sexism row

Dudes ,

Consomme de beouf a la Royale

Dudes ,

A while back it was suggested I'd focus on cuisine .

Well here is one  or at least my "cover" of it.

A Consomme is a cold, clear soup, this version is one for weddings,  special days and anniversaries . Unless you are very rich.

You will need

Ingredients

Carrot: 2
Shallot:2
Celery: 1
Beetroot:1
Mushrooms: 5 ounces
Courgette : 1
Truffle : 1
Cavier 1 tablespoon
Beef  (thin sirloin)    2 ounces
Sherry
Egg white
Coconut cream
Salt
Pepper
Gold leaf
Beef or vegetable stock
Cauliflower
Water


Equipment

1 fine muslin cloth
Knife
Big Pan
Chopping board
Glass  or crystal Goblet
Small painters brush
several bowls
Small dariole moulds
Foil
Tray
Oven
Gas hob
Small vegetable baller
Cullinder


Method

Get your big pan and put into it  the stock/water  about 3/4s  full

Finely chop the carrot , shallots, celery, beetroot, mushrooms and beef.

Mix in a bowl.

Add egg white.

Plonk this into the  pan and bring to boil

[ the beef protein and white will help to clarify the mixture and you will see a cake layer forming on top.]

Once boiled, simmer and with a spoon create an opening : add a glug of sherry and a pinch of salt and pepper.

Simmer for 20 minutes

Meanwhile with the other carrot, use your vegetable baller to scoop out  six "pearls" from the carrot  and cauliflower.

Chop up  Small cubes of courgette

Bring a pan to the boil and cook for 20 minutes.  Drain and leave to cool when cooked.

Put the coconut cream, egg and salt , pepper into a bowl and whisk. Put the result into the moulds. Put into oven at gas mark 2 , for 20 minutes. When done leave to cool. This makes a non savoury coconut custard.

When the consume is ready,  switch off  gas and let cool  , then get another bowl and place the cloth over it, using it as a sieve .  You should have a brown liquid with no solids.


Plating and presentation

You need a large Crystal goblet

When rested and cooled the coconut custard should easily come out of the moulds. Cover this with gold leaf and brush down as necessary (gold leaf is edible and an aphrodisiac).

Place this into the goblet

Then the vegetables  around the  gold leaf  coconut custard

On top of the  gold leaf coconut custard place a spoon full of caviar .

On top of that place the truffle


Finally gently pour into the goblet the  consomme to half way up the custard.



There you have it.


Consomme  de  beouf  a la  Royale fit for a king or queen.

Americans discover Geordie and British ale

All the presidential men?

Hi All,

If a picture says a thousand words, what do readers make of this one?

Shabbat Shalom!

I did watch Dr Who

Hi All,

Okay . I did watch Dr Who via the BBC I player. What did I think of the first two episodes?  As I opined last week it feels and I still feel like it is spin off from real Dr Who.  It's neither bad nor good, just NOT 'real' Dr Who. I'm not sure that I will continue to watch it every week. I may have a big catch up when the series has finished.

Mrs Thatcher for new fifty pound note?

Medium or rare burgers?

Dudes,

I noticed there's no open discussion so I will start one.

Some people have asked 'can you do beef burgers like steaks e.g. medium, rare etc.

The simple answer is that yes it is of course entirely possible to cook a beef burger pink in the middle. But unlike steaks it is a lot more dangerous. In a steak any bacteria is on the outside of the meat, even in a fully compliant hygienic kitchen there will be an element of bacteria present.  The cooking process eliminates the bacteria on the meat (even with blue steaks).  

As beef burgers have a primary ingredient of minced beef  from  steak , once you put that through your mincer (at least that's how I make my burgers, rather than buying them made) , the bacteria is all over the meat. Therefore unless you want to take the risk of getting something like e coli  or semolina from a medium or rare burger, the best practice is to cook it all the way through. 

Note even steak  tartare is either seared or slightly steamed. But I wouldn't eat that either, for the same reasons.

Russian rap

Dudes,

My wife makes love via her French side. And war like her Russian one.

Sammy

Dudes,

My upbringing was stricter than any Victorian headmaster, being told the importance of  the family and getting off your backside to work , which I did in lieu of pocket money(with a percentage given to my uncle and grandparents, although to be fair they invested it to pay for whatever education I'd need).

 I learned my Torah & Talmud quicker than my timetable. That and how to cook , working in the family biz  and farming and boarding school.  I can still remember my first thrashing by the school master over being "impertinent" 

My summer was spent in the  north Yorkshire wilderness ,   with my sisters  Esther, Ruth, Hannah , Rachel ,tending sheep and chanting  psalms in English and then the Sephardic Hebrew, followed  Torah study in the evening. I enlisted in the IDF at 19. I couldn't take to university .


I  finished my national service &  because of the fact I'd been the units cook, I got a job back in England at  burger king,  where in all fairness they trained me up all the way to NVQ kitchen manager level.... Worked in several kitchen pubs, curry houses, Caribbean restaurants and greasy spoon breakfast places   .  Went to France for four years "to become a proper chef" and then  worked in some Michelin London restaurants. Started a few of my own with success and failures.  Met my French wife, went back to Israel.  Two children and a third on the way later ...

The rest is the future...

Taking the plunge to watch Dr who

Hi All ,

This should be the spin off series , like Dr Who's sister (Dr WHAT?), travelling in a British red phone box , rather than a British police box , as a lesbian, ethnic minority with Lenny Henry as the companion.. That would have been cool . That would be so much fun . It worked o.k. for he man and she ra, bro and his (clearly lesbian) sis . But JW isn't the doctor and will never be to traditional fans . I can watch it if I think of it as a spin off serial, but it's not the genuine thing.

If  us women have to make or take  male characters women in order to get pundits then there's something wrong...

Time to take the plunge and watch it....hoping not too much damage will be done to the greatest sci fi show ever .

In the meantime some proper Dr who:

Cask ale any day

Dudes,

Unfortunately Israeli beer is dominated  ghastly gassy piss made by Heineken ,  so naturally one has to educate fellow Israelis and the tourists in the beauty of proper cask ale:

And how to pour it ,  naturally being  a Yorkshire lad, I prefer a "northern pour"

Oh and yes it has to be via a manual pump:  better than a work out at the gym!

Michelangelo Donatello Leonardo Raphael VERSES...

Dudes

Michelangelo
Donatello
Leonardo
Raphael


VS

Michelangelo
Donatello
Leonardo
Raphael

McStrike: f*ck off !

Dudes,

A small taste of what is to come if leftists get their grubby protrusions on the levers of power in the U.K.- in this case the decision by McDonald's ™ , Weatherspoon and TFI Friday  workers striking - with Labour's full blessing and my  with my favourite leftist Owen Jones rejoicing on how young people are " rewriting capitalism"   -  for a £10 per hour wage. 

What ?  What?  If you get that then YOU can explain why prices in  relatively cheap fast food outlets, with thin margins,  increase or why a business will go under because of labour costs .  Then you won't have any money.  This is typical socialism in that it is a given people can get paid a certain wage without the marketplace deciding that wage.

Fuck me! 

When I first started in the restaurant business I was on £2 an hour for another burger chain  and worked for free to get experience in a curry  restaurant, alongside other similar shift jobs to make ends meet, including the co op (£2.50)  and a logistics company (£3.50)  (yes that's PLURAL!). I was paid little, but was heavily invested in by doing several NVQ's and worked my butt off .

I was bought up by my uncle and grandparents.  They were the very essence of Webers 'Protestant work ethic ' , despite my uncle being Anglo Catholic and my grandparents Iraqi Jewish refugees. 

 I'm all in favour of a decent wage and to my mind it is linked to the productive quality of the person employed. I'm happy to pay a pot washer £8  an hour, providing they are productive on the line.   I look after my people , but the whole idea of striking is just champagne socialist leaders stoking problems for their own madcap ideological ends.

But  regardless of all of that.  I was more or less bought up on -

WORK HARD, PLAY HARD  AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT FUCK OFF!

The strange death of the Conservative Party

Hi All,

Well the high holidays are now over. It's like the feeling people get after Christmas and New year. But the good news is that I've been reading and reflecting. 

Which leads nicely to a political theme :  over the past months there's been article after article by both commentators of the left, right and centre about the crisis of conservatism or if I'd be more accurate , the crisis of the conservative party.  In short the feeling is that Labour is presenting a clear alternative to the current system and whatever you think of this socialist rehash they're winning on the policy and ideas front. Contrast this with what seems to be a rudderless conservative government, which is chronically divided on Brexit and offers only austerity : not just cutting back of expenditure , but also substantial tax rises as well.

This is important as there is an old adage that oppositions don't win elections, governments loose them. Sometimes you think the current government is deliberately trying to loose the next election, maybe arrogantly thinking no one would vote for Corbyn, despite all the contrary evidence. 

The matter to me seems that it's not a personnel issue , whatever one thinks of May's  non charismatic and inept managerial type of leadership.  It's not just Brexit: Labour is equally divided as the Conservatives. And austerity  has still enabled the Conservatives to squeak through to be the largest party at elections.

What them is the crisis of the conservative party? The party has in short forgotten what it is there to do or more accurately what it has done in the past.  It is not there to be a social and economic liberal party or a party obsessed with austerity or shrinking the state, it isn't even there to be a cipher for big business. In fact the conservative party exists to do two things, but they both involve being consistent guardsmen of the constitution and economy.

The first is to conserve , that is to keep , uphold  and renew the  constitution , the great institutions of our society and state and in economic terms provide a stable framework for business to operate, but for people to feel secure in work. If it is not broken don't fix it.

The second thing that the conservative party is there to do is to be peremptory when the economic framework, the  constitution, institutions and society needs change : to ensure that things are reformed or changed in such a way that prevents radical revolution down the line, but is sufficiently controlled to make it look like an evolutionary tract rather than a revolutionary one. 

The conservative party has done this in the past , since about 1867 and I would say explains why Britain never feel into a fascist dictatorship in the 1930s,  because there was a strong conservative bulwark against such radical ideologues.

If the conservative party actually took these two principles as its guiding light then issues such as Brexit and austerity would slot into place . 

Maybe I shall do further posts to expand upon this, but they're good examples of how the conservative party seems to think they're means to an end , without thinking what happens after the end.

Statistics can' prove' whatever you want

Hi All,

One of the things that strikes me is that whenever one mentions being gay  and religious to particular people online, sometimes you get an argument that runs like this :

"The Roman Catholic abuse scandal was homosexual and this just shows how evil homosexuality is"

By implication in that worldview is a suggestion that homosexuals- i.e. gay men-  are someone all dangerous predators.

The proof used  is that  the abuse scandal- 80%  of it- was male priests abusing young teenage boys and then a leap of epic proportions is made from this statically factual statement  to an overall generalisation, that because of this  statistic , all homosexuals must be in some or form deranged abusers of teenage boys at worst and at best just something to avoid.  Forgetting the 20% of abuse which was heterosexual , it seems to me that you can only make a conclusion  like this stand if you have a predisposition of disliking homosexuality and homosexuals.

Why? 

If you think about it , such a statistic on its own is meaningless.   I have another statistic for you.

Take  for example. Male teachers who sleep with their female teenage pupils- in the UK teachers cannot legally sleep with their pupils even if there is consent or even if they are above the legal age of 16 .  

So 

100% are men

They sleep with 100% of teenage females (13-18)

This is heterosexual sex.

Does that make 100% of male teachers or 100% of men predisposed or guilty of a crime or manipulating /  being  abusers?

Same with heterosexual women  teachers who sleep with teenage boys.

Does this make all heterosexual sexual people wicked, wrongful or automatically sinful? 

Or does it mean a handful - out of the many-  of heterosexual teachers  who  commit a crime &  go out of their way to manipulate  /  sleep with their teenage pupils? 

Can you see the point I'm making here? 

Cooking non kosher for no Jews ?

Dudes 

One of the questions I often get asked is 'can a Jewish chef cook non kosher food e.g. pork ?' And can Jews cook for non Jews? 

In short the answer is yes on both accounts, so I can cook a full English breakfast  or alligator steaks. Note:  I wouldn't do so in my own kitchens as they are run to kosher standards. However if I owned a pub in the UK or a non kosher restaurant then I would have no problems.  

The exception to this rule is foods , wherein cheese and meat are mixed together. This is due to the prohibition in the Torah against "boiling a (kid) goat in its mother's milk",specifically 

Exodus 23:19

Exodus 34:26

Deuteronomy 14:21

In Jewish interpretation  this results in three rules  :

the prohibition against cooking a mixture of milk and meat

the prohibition against eating a cooked mixture of milk and meat

the prohibition against deriving any benefit from a cooked mixture of milk and meat.

So if you are a traditional Jew, you cannot cook cheeseburger,  lasagne , some curry or pizza for your  Non Jewish friends, even if the meat is from a kosher animal such as beef or chicken. It is of course possible to cook these items by tweaking the recipes, but that's a story for another post. 

Incidentally there is also different schools of thought on  whether the prohibition on cooking milk and meat together  applies to animals Jews can eat (technically kosher isn't just the animal, but the way it is slaughtered and the removal of blood) or  that plus forbidden  animals. There is one school of thought that would allow a Jew to cook, say, a ham pizza or a Vindaloo as both contain meat which is not kosher (pork).  Personally I would go with this leniency , but my better half would not. 

May will bend over for the EU , but why?

Shit Dudes,

When you read or watch a play with prose like this ,which is exactly what the British government should be saying to Michel Barnier , Junkie, the EU, the Irish and the other EU governments  :

You wonder 'how the fuck did Britain end up with a stupid cow like May , even Israel has a free trade agreement with the Jew hating EU.' A question I didn't ask, but one from an Israeli who stated their feelings with typical bluntness. May it is true couldn't organise a piss up in brewery and  has been played like a puppet by the EU since day 1. So much for England, harry , and st George.


Oh and for those who denounce Shakespeare as an Anitsemite , especially via the merchant of Venice, one notes that he never had to pen the most important nugget of the play, that little bit in which he cleverly and rather subversively shows us that even a Jewish 'baddie' (we all were in those days ) was a human being and incidentally exposing the hypocrisy of the Christian characters and general prejudices   - during which Jews were seen as at best problematic and at worst demonic (actually some things don't change,  * cough* ,  Labour) :