Favours owed. Favours given.

 Hi All,

'So what does everyone think we should do?' Asked Kat as she looked around the table.

'You first' I suggested.

Kat took another gulp of wine, having almost demolished her first bottle. 

Kat began her monologue . 'I say we bailout the Church via a soft loan. Say we can borrow from the Bank of Earth at 1%, we half the Church's current 6% rate to 3%, we're still on a profitable margin. Of course we'd have to work out a structure and where the debt is best placed to get paid off and who'll manage their colonies, but its a working deal in principle. This will give the Royal Bank confidence that their loans are 100% certain to get repaid, we "encourage" the Federal Mortgage and Housing Company to go in their and aggressively buy up all of the bank's mortgages, and "suggest" to the Treasury the Bank can survive as an old fashioned utility bank. The rest of it, such as its investment bank and the other non-banking assets should be sold. We'll be the buyers, we will be fair and buy their assets at market rate, each of us can cherry pick what they want- we've got our eye on their Star transport division and leasing company -  and the rest can be auctioned off to the smaller corporates. Job done'. 

Kat scanned the rest of us to see how this proposal was going. 

'I'm still thinking it through' I said, as I was getting Clara to run a few things for me, but the processing time was extremely slow. 

Gerhard 'Percy'  Stein was next to speak up. This would be interesting, as at the age of 175,  he was Mr Property. A refugee from Germany, who'd come to Britain after the third world war, he'd started off  in the rental buy to let market, housing fellow German and European refugees. As Portal technology expanded into the 1970s and 1980s and it became clear that motor, railways  and aviation transport would quickly go the way of the horse and cart, he began to buy up the old infrastructure and turning it into housing, whole train tracks and motorways became housing estates. Schools and hospitals could be built anywhere, given portal tech, so he didn't have to worry about building any other than cheap housing. His business turned its attention to space earlier than most and today is one of the largest Planetary development companies.  

'I have no real interest in bailing out a bank' Percy admitted with typical German bluntness. 'Especially with certain investors across the table' glancing at Janice House with venom, who returned the shot with a pout . 'Who have a history of betraying people'. 

'So' Percy continued. I am happy to buy out both the Church's Planetary portfolio and that of the Royal Bank, In return the Church have 2.5% shares in my company. If we are going to asset strip the Bank, then I'm happy to buy out their Planetary portfolio for market value plus 25% .  I'm not taking on any of the Churches nor for that matter than bank's  debt nor their non-terraformed planets or uninhabited pieces of rock such as the Canterbury Trojan' [I had to look this up and it was an asteroid the size of Devon and Somerset which has Trojan orbit with Earth, Bingo! That's what I was looking for. Was it too convenient that he'd just mention that?].

'Janice?'  Kat asked. 

Janice House, 133 years old, but looking not a day over 22, was the odd one out here, coming as she did  from  new -old money, a scion of New England wealth and of America's banking elite, JP House &Co had been in business since the Antebellum period of American history, a force in the global economy since the early 20th century, it had become a galactic banking conglomerate by the 22nd, despite the challenges posed to banks in the past 100 years, in part by becoming a sort of 'captive bank' to various companies which it had bought out over the years . You see banks were a dying breed in the same way coal was replaced by oil and then solar plasma,  thanks to web technology that allowed everyone to have their own e-vault accounts that banks couldn't access. Banks nowadays only offered savings accounts to individuals and companies, except for private banking, which required you to have at least a billion in cash at anyone time. Banks still operated as investment banks and  were still useful for big ticket loans, such as mortgages and business investments, but even here they were in competition with a multitude of other investment vehicles and go fund me pages. 

'We are actually an Episcopalian family deadpanned Janice. 'But JP House has no real interest in bailing out a failing investment portfolio, even as a favour to our Church. So Mr Stein - and whoever - can keep it. As for the Royal Bank, we'd be interested in some form of asset purchase, maybe its investment and private banking arms'.

'And finally, that leaves you Ellie' said Kat.

I composed myself as much as I could after a couple of glasses of vinto tinto. 'OK. ok' . 

'So it seems that Percy wants EHC to take the crappy and hard bits of the Church's portfolio and we've got no idea who's taking on its debt. So ok. We'll take on the debt 100% and the non terraformed and uninhabited asteroids , meteoroids, comets   et al'.  Percy looked pleased. Kat seems to be getting pissed and Janice was poker faced. 'Consider this to be a favour' I said to Percy. He nodded in a courtly fashion. 'Ma'am, I can hear your generous father speaking this afternoon'. 

'In respect the Bank, we have no real interest in it. I suggest that the rest of you make a full inventory of the things you want and things to sell to others as per Kat's suggestion. As the Treasury Secretary said he doesn't actually care what happens to it provided we resolve it. But to do that no-one has actually thought of how we are going to get there. The Bank's share price is still over £40,000 a share' (incidentally EHC price per share is £55million).

Janice nodded. 'Yes they won't sell until it gets to pennies per share and they'll be all over the Central Bank for Lender of Last resort, the Feds for a bailout and Parliament will be reminded of al the campaign contributions. So we need some-one to do a bit of dark ops on them'.

'We will do that, so no-one can come back on us and say we've benefited. Consider it a favour owed'. 

'Very well' she said as if these kind of things were normal. 

'Good job pet, I've just let my board know about the situation and to get a team together. I'm assuming everyone else will as well?' said Kat. 

'Done' said Percy and Janice in unison. 

'That's our job done then. I suppose we'd better be off. Oh and as you can all see I've just notified Treasury of the situation' said Kat. 'Ta-ta pet'. 

I said goodbye to them all as they left through the portal that was hidden in the palm tree. 

I asked Kat, my gut instinct was telling me she wasn't quite Kosher,  what would happen if the Church didn't agree to the terms; 'Well pet. It would be hell to pay'.