Hi all,
There are three golden rules to Martian food and cooking :
1. It has to be 😎§⇯ڠד👆 or Q'usher . The Martian script is basically hieroglyphs which combine logographic, syllabic and alphabetic elements, but unfortunately when rendered to English this writing results in gibberish. Thankfully a delegation of Earth Rabbis asked if the food was kosher and following dialogue both sides understood that they had various food laws given to them by God ( the Marian religion is also monotheistic) . Because Martians confused the pronunciation of K with Q , so Queen becomes Kween and King , Qwing. Interestingly these are also the transliterations for homosexual gay men and women. Anyways they used a Q for Kosher and use this in transliteration ; in short Q'usher is a long list of things that Martians can and cannot eat according to their religious texts.
2. Food is sub divided by flavour, taste and smell . Collectively this is Nahar, Rebar and Khushoo. Often these will, like Newton's law , result in food that produces a reaction for every equal and opposite reaction.
3. The DUM classification . This stands for Distroo , Uistroo and Mistroo ; quick , medium and long with pubs and restaurants doing either or all types. It refers to how long food takes to prepare and cook. Generally D food takes up to 30 minutes, U food 31 to 59 minutes and M food 60 plus minutes.
There are 6 mealtimes for Martians , organised around the time of day for prayers [ transliteration of course, you see "first contact" with Martians was made by the British circa 1963 . The Martian system of government is an Imperial + Parliamentary Theonomy , in which prayers and meals go together, so they assumed that the church of England was similar , having seats in the House of Lords and so used what they thought was the Anglican equivalent ] :
1. Mattins 4 to 9.00
2. Elevenzes 11 to noon
3. Tiffin Luncheon Noon to 14.30
4. Vespers Tea 15.00 to 19 .00
5. Evensong 20.00 to 23.30
6. Compline Peach 00.00 to 01.30
